THIS IS 45 YEARS OLD!

This is 45 years old! Don’t get caught up on a number. It makes me sad when I hear women and men depressed about their birthdays coming! I have loved my 40s. My 40s have been liberating! I have finally stopped worrying about pleasing other people and I please myself! I no longer say “yes” I will do it… when I mean, I don’t want too! I don’t care who doesn’t like me or who said what about me. It doesn’t matter! It doesn’t pay my bills nor change my tomorrow. In fact, the ones who used to run back to tell me what they said are no longer around me because why were they listening! 

Now that I am midway settled into my 40s, I realize some lessons have come with my 40s. I want to share 20 with you.

1. Make it a priority to love yourself! 

2. Don’t hold grudges, they end up hurting you more than the other people.

3. Travel and enjoy your life. See as much as you can.

4. If you want to do it, do it! Stop second guessing yourself.

5. Learn to trust your gut.

6. Spend as much time with your parents as you can.

7. Be vulnerable (don’t let your past hurt your future).

8. Make time for yourself.

9. Make memories, when life is over that’s all you have.

10. Stop worrying about the end result and enjoy the journey. 

11. Drink your water.

12. Stand up for yourself, don’t tolerate disrespect no matter who it’s from.

13. Never stop learning.

14. Listen more.

15. Let the ego go.

16. If your life isn’t where you want it to be, change your circle.

17.  Only spend time and energy on people who feed your soul.

18. Don’t save the good outfits, the good champagne. Enjoy them on any occasion!!

19. Eat your fruits and vegetables.

20. Happiness is a choice!

Enjoy your 40s! They really are fabulous and so are you! 

REPOST: AT AGE 30, THESE WERE THE RULES THAT I SET FOR MY LIFE

This time of the year, people begin to reflect on how they want their lives to look and what changes need to made. Here’s a post about the rules I once made for myself.

***

When I turned 30, I made a new list of rules for myself.

  1. No more letting people borrow money that they never pay back!
  2. No more paying for women to have abortions! 
  3. No more accepting collect calls!
  4. No more taking care of other people’s children!
  5. No more feeling guilty and doing things I don’t want to do!
  6. No more going places because other people want me to go!
  7. No more meeting people’s families so they can prove they know me!
  8. I was tired of being the birthday clown. (Yes, people ask for you to come over like I’m a birthday present to someone.  It’s weird)!
  9. No more fake friends.  I’d rather spend my days alone!
  10. No more dating groupies (male groupies are just as bad as women)!
  11. No more driving people around like I’m a taxi!
  12. And last but not least, no more putting other people’s needs in front of my own!

I received an inspirational text from my friend Keeland Ellis that I will never forget. He told me, “Have no friends who do not equal you. Watch those that you don’t know who are always wanting to be with you, and those who are wanting to be like you!”

I wish he would have told me this straight out of high school but he told me on time because not only did I hear every word of it, but I understand it now so I guess that’s an example of God’s time.

I’M NOT SATISFIED!

When I say this many people around me take it wrong, they think I’m not happy. I am very happy, but I am one of those people who is not satisfied or willing to settle in my life. I don’t know that I will ever be satisfied. There are 1000 things I have yet to accomplish. Yes, my list is long, I have goals and aspirations I’ve yet to even explore.

Satisfied Vs. Happy

Happiness is a state of mind, while satisfaction is the absence of want.

Now material things don’t satisfy me, and they are not my goal. I get off accomplishing my dreams. People try to tell me I’ve accomplished enough. They constantly remind me of my past, while I appreciate my journey and the fact it’s remembered, the point they missed it’s not about what anyone else thinks or feels about me. It’s what I have personally lined up for myself in my head. Entertainment is not my only goal, believe it or not, there is more to me. I understand most of you know my characters, but you don’t know my character.  I dream bigger than the smoke and mirrors of Hollywood.

I’m attracted to ambition and accomplishing things I put on my to do list! I get a high manifesting my future. See, I realized early in my life I control my destiny and no other soul can stop me from my goals but me.

Some people don’t achieve their goals because they are surrounded by people who never completed theirs. The easiest way for me to get ghost on someone is for them to doubt me, not be ambitious themselves or for them to be complacent.

They say you become the closest 5 people to you. With that said, I purged a lot of people. I refuse to be the smartest in the room. I surround myself with people who are able to teach me something. People who add to my life, people who breath energy into me. We all need to find those types… Dream big people, your thoughts become realities!

MY FRIEND TURNED PAPARAZZI

Living in the entertainment world is definitely a weird, outside the box, interesting one for sure. And it’s not always fun! You never really know what your friendships will lead to or what the intent of them were.

14 years ago, I met this young cute girl who is in the same rat race as many in Los Angeles trying to break into entertainment. Well, she got a break…and as a black woman I am proud of her and cheering her on because there are not a lot of jobs for us in Hollywood. 

While our friendship was not paying her bills, I can’t help but to feel betrayed not just for me but for so many that I know that she associates with. She took a job as paparazzi! 

While I understand that her friendships are not paying her bills…and I get it, girl get your money especially during Covid, it’s deeply concerning to watch her talk about people that I love!  I know she’s coming in contact with these people. That’s so messy. 

The truth is history repeats itself and it’s probably only a matter of time before one of my stories are up and then what’s going to happen? Those 14 years of friendship, will they be used against me? Will you deliver the story that was assigned to you or you might even break it? Will my daughter’s identity now be disclosed for a paycheck?  Again, I get it…it’s a job. We all need to pay our bills but please know I’m not speaking for myself; I’m speaking for a group of us. We are uncomfortable and feeling betrayed. 

Tables always turn so while you’re talking about somebody’s messy divorce today, it could be your family that they’re talking about tomorrow … No new friends (in my Drake voice).

www.TeamCherieJ.com

OWN YOUR NAME

Little Cherie had a hard time understanding why people couldn’t get her name right! The constantly correcting people gave her the tag line when introducing herself, “like the fruit,” which has stuck with her 45 years. 

“Like the fruit,” says Kellie Williams Jackson. Her a recent interview on Cherie’s World Podcast has me cracking up! It’s become so second nature I no longer even think about it.

Sidebar (Yes, I often talk about myself in 1st, 2nd and 3rd person. Hope you can follow) 

The description Black Cherie is one I take pride in. May-August is Cherry Season. Which makes sense as to why summer has always been my favorite time of the year! Cherry is a natural healer full of vitamins. Which explains my Fixer Empath energy. 

Black Cherries

Your name is more than just your identification, it becomes a part of who you are and the characteristics you possess. 

Everyone out there with unique names, enjoy living outside the box, not worrying about mixing up your drinks at Starbucks. Correct them EVERY TIME until they get it right! It’s scientifically proven when you introduce yourself people will remember the unique names easier than they remember the common ones. So, enjoy life being unforgettable, and give them something to remember! 

I DO NOT OWN A SCALE!

I threw my scale in the trash 10 years ago. Having a scale in my bathroom was one of those extra accessories I no longer needed. 

I had these 2 aunts that would walk into my Mom’s house and before they would say hello, they would say, “Wow, you must be eating good…” “Those cheeks are extra chubby, aren’t they?” Then they would giggle amongst themselves about how big my face, my boobs or whatever their subject of the moment was. (Their extreme cattiness got on my nerves and gave me anxiety.) Until I got grown and realized I wasn’t the problem, they were! They were extremely unhappy with themselves and constantly trying to improve themselves and would talk about everyone they came in contact with. Not my issue, it was their own. 

Yes, like most women my weight fluctuates 10 pounds here or there depending on time of the month or how much ice cream I’ve eaten and there is NOTHING wrong with that! 

One day I got on the scale looked down and then up and said, “Cherie what are you doing? Your jeans fit. Maybe tight, maybe a little loose, but they fit regardless!” 

Yes, I was talking to myself in 3rd person. I’ve never been overweight. Maybe a little chubby, maybe a little too thin, but I remain healthy and that’s what matters most. Backhand compliments from others about my weight would never make me step on one of these things daily again. 

Weight is NOT one size fits all! Weight is about health! Everyone is not supposed to be thin, buxom is beautiful. 

The goal should never be a number, it should be your health. The number is different for everyone. I am a nutritionist. Trust my word more than the Hollywood tabloids, your gossiping aunties or any other superficial, unprofessional opinions. 

Obsessing over the number on the scale is unhealthy.

www.TeamCherieJ.com

10 THINGS YOU DON’T KNOW ABOUT ME

10 things you don’t know about me:

1. I have no patience and I hate waiting. Time is one of the only things I can’t get back in this world, like my virginity. So, when it’s wasted, I’m pissed.

2. I don’t like talking on the phone.

3. After 30, I became antisocial.

4. I can’t stand dirty ears.

5. After breaking down my guns and cleaning them, I can put them back together blind folded thanks 2 my brother Mark! (These were the games he taught me as a kid, smh, lol.) We grew up with guns and were taught to never disrespect their power but how to use them if needed or necessary. If u take care of them, they will take care of you.

6. In a room full of people I’d rather observe than talk.

7. I had my ex-boyfriend’s name tattoo’d on me as a young girl. LOL, it’s now covered. (Because of who it is, I don’t regret it. Just thankful I didn’t put any of the others’ damn names on me.)

8. I like me… so I don’t care if you don’t like me.

9. I don’t dress trendy. I wear what I like no matter what others feel about it.

10. I dream of producing TV shows and movies, even owning a Ferrari. I’m still playing “That’s my car” with my big brother, lol.

www.TeamCherieJ.com

I HAVEN’T BEEN VERY INSPIRED TO WRITE LATELY…

I haven’t been very inspired to write lately. I hope I don’t have the Corona blues. While I don’t feel down, I am starting to feel life inside is the same day after day. Never thought it was taking a toll on me because I am a total introvert until my team hit me up and said, “Hey we need blogs.” “Oh, (I thought to myself) I guess cooking, social media and homeschool hasn’t really inspired me lately because everyone is doing the same thing now.” 

Homeschooling was like an exclusive club a few months back but look at us now! Lol, it’s a national thing.

I do wish more parents would embrace it and try to have fun with it since they know it’s temporary. As parents, education should be a main concern. While I understand most have a new value system for teachers, your child’s education shouldn’t be solely in the hands of strangers. So if you need guidance, I work with an amazing group of teachers ready to help you.

Lilcheriehelps@gmail.com 

www.TeamCherieJ.com

MY LOVE FOR SOCIAL MEDIA

I’m really excited because social media has really closed the gap, it’s giving me a chance to become friends with people who have grown up with me. And for that I’d like to thank you. Oh, I have my moments where I hate social media. But today, I’m full of love. Someone wrote me that they were 44 years old and they started watching me on Punky Brewster. Then I got excited because I like their comment, so not only did I like the comment, but I followed his page. It was so sweet to me that he would even care. I grew up with you, just like a lot of you don’t feel that I’m a stranger, I don’t feel that you are either. You’re like that friend or a family member that I haven’t seen in a really long time but when we get together, we pick back up right where we left off. For me, that’s the most beautiful thing about social media. I also have learned that social media is really good for my business. I’ve been able to come in contact with new clients, to keep my clients and it’s become an awesome tool for me to handle customer service myself. So today I am thankful for each and every one of you. I love you! Enjoy your day because you have made mine.

Kisses love,

Cherie

AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO BUYS STUFF I WILL NEVER WEAR??!!

I don’t enjoy shopping. I am not the average girl, I know. I do not want to go out and try on clothes. I hate makeup and don’t wanna comb my hair! Maybe because I always do it for work. Someone else is always picking out my clothes and I try on outfit after outfit, so I always feel like it’s work and NOT something I want to do in my free time. (I don’t enjoy it… it’s like a chore).

So occasionally when I have to go buy clothes, I run in a store and I just pull things off the rack.  I never try them on. I come home and find them in my closet months later… this is exactly what happened with this item. 

So, it’s springtime supposedly but the weather is completely bipolar. Today was one of those days where it wasn’t hot, and it wasn’t freezing but it was a little chilly. So, it’s in the back of my closet and I remember I had bought this like sweatshirt thing that I thought was going to be totally cute on and will be perfect just to run to the grocery store. Well when I put it on, I felt like a complete idiot. I wanted to know what happened to the rest of my sweatshirt. Maybe I’m just getting old, but I wanted my shoulders covered. For some reason I was completely uncomfortable. I kept pulling the sleeves up trying to see if I could cover my shoulders one way or another, but it just wasn’t working. This is by far one of the most God-awful things I’ve ever purchased for myself. It’s one of those things will just sit in my closet forever that I will never wear until I end up donating it. It reminds me of when my brother used to look at my clothes and ask me, “What happened to the rest of them?” 

Cold Shoulder

I put it on and screamed what happened to the material that was supposed to cover my shoulders? And the ruffles at the top don’t make it no better. I hate this sweatshirt, it’s not even grocery store worthy. (I hate the grocery store) My damn shoulders will freeze in the grocery store! No way did I look like Naomi Oats Harper from the hit show Mama’s Family

Mama’s Family

Yeah, I just told my age! Look at my shoulders, just cold for no reason!