TO SPANK OR NOT TO SPANK THAT IS MY QUESTION

Sooo as many of you know, I have this funny, intelligent 3-year-old daughter. Well today in Tae Kwon Do she didn’t want to listen to the 10-year-old assistant teacher. She felt she was bossing her around. To my embarrassment, after class she confessed she told the girl “If you do not stop telling me what to do, I will throw you in the wall and drown you”. I was in shock and couldn’t believe I was raising a 3-year-old bully.

As I sat her in her car seat, I explained that telling people she would drown them will not be tolerated! That probably hurt the girl’s feelings and she would be punished when we got home. She was quiet with her head down for 3 stop lights, then said “Mommy can you take me back so I can apologize to her?” A part of me wanted to turn around but I told her, “No, you apologize on Monday when you see her!” She began to cry and said, “Oh mommy, I don’t wanna be a bully and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.” “Too late you little bully,” I told her and the whole-time picturing how tall the little girl was towering over her. I had no idea she was so mouthy or brave.

When we got home I told her to march herself right in the room. I was just behind her. She sat on her bed and I said, “What do you think your punishment should be? Should I spank you or should I take Marie?” Marie is her kitty stuffed animal she got on a trip to Disneyland. She jumps up pulls down her cartwheel shorts and underwear, touches the ground with both of her hands and sticks bare ass in my face! (I’ve never pulled her pants down and spanked her. I don’t know where she got this from.)

It took every bit of my acting skills NOT to burst out laughing!  I turned around, picked up Marie and put Marie in the top of the closet. She busted out crying, ran in MY room and got in my bed under my covers and cried for 5 minutes. When she was finished, she wiped her face on my comforter… boogers and all and said, “Mommy I promise from now on I will have halos in my eyes. I’m going to be good!”

I remember saying to my mom “Hitting me doesn’t help. It doesn’t make me want to be good.” KARMA, I have a child just like me. Spanking won’t work. I have to stay alert and pay attention to what means a lot to her and take it away.  THAT she cares about. Creative discipline is going to be my friend. I’d love to hear what creative ways you have disciplined your children.