Yes, I am happiest alone and tend to shy away from people as much as I can. As I grow older, I realize it’s because I am somewhat of an empath. Energy transfers and a lot of y’all have fucked up energy! Even many that I love have horrible energy and I have no desire to feel it. Even when you’re not complaining, the fact that you’re not happy in life weighs heavy on a empath’s heart.
I used 2 be the type who helped everyone and was somewhat of a fixer. If I could fix your issues, your self-esteem or help you pay your bills, I would but that shit is emotionally and financially draining. I’m over it and have divorced that part of my former self. In result, I also divorced many friendships willingly.
Now, I enjoy my peace. It doesn’t mean I don’t like you…but if you can’t share my space often, it might mean your energy just drains me. Have you ever gotten off the phone with someone and you all of a sudden were physically tired and depressed, but right before the call you were happy and energetic? I don’t mean a call that delivered bad news or a death but a regular call from the homie? That means energy transferred now you are carrying their vibe with you, until you shake it off or transfer it back to someone else. I hate that feeling. I no longer wish to take on other people’s emotions. By myself, I’m chill with no drama. Except my drama of motherhood but that’s my entertainment!
I have friends who think they are being sweet, but they get on my nerves tryna force me to be positioned in social situations. I try to explain it to them, but they don’t get it. I don’t need more friends, I don’t want nobody else calling my phone, I aint tryna hang out. I’m tryna chill at Chuck E Cheese, not a bar, a social gathering, or anywhere with these grown folks. I could be doing something with my kid! I’ve spent my entire life being social. I literally want to spend some time being left alone. I don’t see why that’s so hard to understand.
My whole point in writing this was to say preserve your mental health by guarding the energy you allow to share your personal space.
Okay, I have a question. Am I the only one who feels it’s morally right to let people know when your battling mental health issues?
We need to talk more openly and honestly about mental health and breaking down the stigmas…
1 out of 5 adults, that’s 43.8 million people in the United States, are suffering from mental health issues. An estimated 26% of homeless adults staying in shelters live with serious mental illness
Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel and act, as we cope with life. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Mental health is important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence through adulthood.
Depression, anxiety, bipolar and schizophrenia are just a few mental health issues people suffer from.
So, in one way or another, we have all encountered people who are battling mental health issues. I myself found myself in a friendship where I didn’t understand the drama until the friendship blew up and turned bad… very bad but all could have been avoided if I would have known my friend was bipolar!
I’m not saying I wouldn’t have been friends with her if I would have known she was battling a real disorder. What I am saying is, I would have handled things a lot differently from the start if I would have known she was clinical. Now things are too far gone to salvage the friendship. I choose to keep my distance, but understanding the real issue made it easy to forgive and wish her well…
When you battle mental health issues, it doesn’t just affect you but everyone you choose to bring in your life!
I think it’s important to be transparent with how you are feeling so that everyone in the house is on the same page. Being a homeschool mom, sometimes, the relationship between parenthood and teacher isn’t always a happy one for my child or myself. When we are transparent with how we are feeling we are better able to aid in each other’s journey.
There is something about female hormones and mood swings that doesn’t always mix. Yes, she may be 4 but she is fierce and mighty. I have to remind myself that nobody wakes up happy every single day and everyone is entitled to bad days… even a 4-year-old!
So that I can keep a grip on how she is feeling, part of her morning work is to draw a silly face about her mood on the top of a worksheet. After I grade the worksheet, I hand it back to her with my mood on it as well. Sometimes we laugh… other times we share a hug and an encouraging word! Either way we are able to be on the same page.
An extra 2 minutes with this chart helps me stay in tune with my daughter’s inner self!